I Don't Own Emotion, I Rent

Sun sign, Leo. Moon sign, Pisces. Rising sign, Gemini.






I can't help hating you. You're human.

Taoism: Shit happens
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Confucianism: Confucius say shit happens.
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Buddhism: If shit happens, it's not really shit.
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Zen Buddhism: What is the sound of shit happening?
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Hinduism: This shit has happened before.
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Islam: If shit happens, it is the will of Allah.
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Catholicism: If shit happens, you deserve it.
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Presbyterian: This shit was bound to happen.
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Lutheran: If shit happens, don't talk about it.
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Judaism: Why does shit always happen to us?
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Calvinism: Shit happens because you dont work.
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Seventh day advt.: No shit shall happen on Saturday.
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Creationism: God made all shit.
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TV evangelism: Send more shit.
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Quakers: Let's not fight over this shit.
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Utopianism: This shit does not stink at all.
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Darwinism: This shit was once food.
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Capitalism: That's my shit.
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Communism: Let's share this shit.
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Feminism: Men are shit.
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Chauvinism: We may be shit, but you can't live without us
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Commersialism: Let's package this shit.
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Impressionism: From a distance, this shit looks like a garden
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Idolism: Let's bronze this shit.
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Existentialism: Shit doesn't happen - shit IS.
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Stoicism: This shit doesn't bother me.
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Hedonism: There's nothing like a good shit happening.
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Mormonism: God sent us this shit.
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Scientology: If shit happens, see Diatenics, page 157.
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Jehovah's witnesses: Knock knock. Shit happens.
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Moon-ism: Only really happy shit happens.
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Hare Krishna: Shit happens, rama rama.
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Rastafarianism: Let's smoke this shit. Practical Deal with shit one day at a
time.
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Agnostic: Maybe shit happens, then again, maybe not.
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Satanism: SNEPPAH THIS
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Atheism: What shit?
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Nihilism: No shit!
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New age: This shit has an aura. Copyright.